


Gender doesn't exist and the moon landing was fake

by Lesboplasm



Series: It's all queer to me [2]
Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Another Episode, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Almost all the ships are just mentioned so if youre just here for ships then yeah, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Chatting & Messaging, Comedy, F/F, F/M, Gender headcanons, Group chat, LGBT+, M/M, Non-binary character, Sexuality Headcanons, Slice of Life, Trans Character, chatfic, headcanons, yep
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-10
Updated: 2018-04-10
Packaged: 2019-04-21 06:23:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14278812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lesboplasm/pseuds/Lesboplasm
Summary: Trans and enby students of Hope's Peak were the first queer kids to make their own group chat. Move aside gays, the real trendsetters are here.Also Yuta gets harrassed by his overbearing sister.





	Gender doesn't exist and the moon landing was fake

Leon (trans boy, he/him)- Nickelback self insert  
Chihiro (demiboy, they/them/he/him)- *keyboard smash* I'm in  
Mukuro (demigirl, they/them/she/her)- Kill Bill sirens  
Junko (genderless being of despair, they/them/he/him/she/her)- *Blasts Mettaton theme*  
Aoi (trans girl, she/her)- Literally Dory  
Makoto (trans boy, he/him)- Dating sim protagonist  
Imposter/Sagishi (genderfluid, they/them/he/him/she/her)- Lowkey should probably be in prison  
Fuyuhiko (trans boy, he/him)- Rough boi  
Chiaki (demigirl, they/them/she/her)- 8-bit beauty  
Kaede (trans girl, she/her)- Wannabe Kelsi Neilson  
Shuichi (trans boy, he/him)- The Blue's Clues guy  
Angie (agender, they/them)- WELCOME TO BIBLE STUDY  
Kiyo (genderfluid, they/them/he/him/she/her)- Too many kinks to kinkshame  
Kiibo (genderqueer, they/them, is sometimes alright with he/him)- The brave little toaster

** Gender was made up by the government to try and trick us into being capitalists **

The brave little toaster: How are my friends doing today? 

The Blue's Clues guy: Pretty good actually, how are you Kiibo? 

The brave little toaster: Great! Although a little disheartened...

8-bit beauty: Aw why

The brave little toaster: It seems my goal to find a romantic bond is going to be a bit harder than I thought.

The brave little toaster: Not many people want to date a robot, and those that do see my asexuality as a deal breaker.

The brave little toaster: Apparently they see me as a sexual object :(

Kill Bill sirens: Who and where are these people? I can sort them out for you

Nickelback self insert: Mukuro is always rearing to kill some creepy aphobes 

Kill Bill sirens: Yeah but who isn't 

Rough boi: Reminder- I have literal assassins that can kill anybody I want 

Rough boi: In case you wanted a favour, Kiibo

The brave little toaster: Nobody needs to be killed! Just educated enough in order to leave their robophobic ignorance behind. 

The brave little toaster: Really though, I don't understand how they think I'm supposed to have sex/feel sexual attraction without genitals.

Rough boi: Cause they're assholes who need to get punched

Kill Bill sirens: Or stabbed 

8-bit beauty: I think just punching is enough... Unless we want to upgrade to a Heaven-Slaying Dragon Fist

WELCOME TO BIBLE STUDY: No need to tire ourselves out! Atua shall smite them! :D

Nickelback self insert: Somehow Angie saying that was scarier than both the soldier and the crime boss

WELCOME TO BIBLE STUDY: :DDDDDDD

Literally Dory: Don't worry Kiibo! I'm sure one day you'll find your soulmate! 

The brave little toaster: Soulmates are scientifically not possible. 

Literally Dory: SAY THAT TO MY FACE!!! 

The Blue's Clues guy: Ok, let's just,, calm down

Literally Dory: EVERBODY HAS EITHER ONE OR MULTIPLE PERFECT SOMEBODIES FOR THEM AND YOU DO TOO AND YOU ARE GOING TO FIND THEM KIIBO DO YOU HEAR ME?! 

The brave little toaster: Y-yes? 

8-bit beauty: Aoi's so forceful she made Kiibo stutter through text message...

Literally Dory: Great! 

Literally Dory: To the Kiibo understanding bit, not to the them stuttering bit 

Rough boi: We get it

Literally Dory: Oh! Also! Me and Sagishi got added to a new group chat by Kokichi! 

The Blue's Clues guy: Oh no, that's never good

WELCOME TO BIBLE STUDY: Oh right! He mentioned that to me! 

WELCOME TO BIBLE STUDY: It is like this one, but exclusively for homosexuals, correct? 

Literally Dory: Yep! 

Literally Dory: I gotta say, though, this one is a lot more... Peaceful? Than that one? 

Kill Bill sirens: What do you mean? 

Literally Dory: Like, people seem to only like certain other people, and everybody's really ready to bitch at eachother

Lowkey should probably be in prison: To be fair, it is to be expected from a group chat that includes Celestia, Byakuya, Hiyoko, Nagito, Rantaro and Kokichi.

Nickelback self insert: Oh no, yeah, that is like the ultimate salty crew

8-bit beauty: I'm good friends with Hiyoko and Nagito though... 

Literally Dory: It's not that I dislike them! Me and Celeste go out for tea all the time! They're just... 

Lowkey should probably be in prison: Hard to handle when they're in a weird mood... Which they seem to be constantly in...

Rough boi: I have noticed that Nagito seems to be getting better after he and Hajime got together

Too many kinks to kinkshame: And Kokichi and Rantaro would probably get better if they would admit their deep attraction towards eachother and finally date.

Kill Bill sirens: Tea 

WELCOME TO BIBLE STUDY: Hiya Kiyo! 

Too many kinks to kinkshame: Hello Angie.

The Blue's Clues guy: Nagito is getting more sociable thanks to his time spent around Chiaki and Hajime, the same goes for Byakuya with Makoto and Kiyotaka, Hiyoko is more often than not able to be kept under control by Mahiru being around, and as Kiyo said, when Kokichi and Rantaro are finally able to admit their feelings for eachother and also when Kokichi starts seeking therapy, they will stop being so... You know. The just leaves Celeste, but she never usually makes too big of a fuss. Not that any of them are bad or unbearable people, they can just be malicious sometimes, but that doesn't stop us from caring about them and supporting them as friends. 

Kill Bill sirens: ...

Lowkey should probably be in prison: ...

Too many kinks to kinkshame: ...

Nickelback self insert: ...Why do I feel like Shuichi has a big cork board in his room with all of our strengths and weaknesses pinned up on it? 

*Blasts mettaton theme*: Omg Shuichi!!! Me too!!!

The Blue's Clues guy: I just notice things! I'm a detective, it's nothing weird! 

8-bit beauty: Right... 

Literally Dory: But you're right Shuchi

Literally Dory: Now I kind of feel bad about talking about them like that... I mean they clearly do all mean a lot to eachother, you can especially tell that Byakuya and Celeste are strong friends, and that Celeste sees Kokichi as kind of a little brother. 

Lowkey should probably be in jail: You're right, they are definitely good people.

WELCOME TO BIBLE STUDY: Atua has truly blessed us with them in our lives! ^_^

Rough boi: You guys are mushy... 

*Blasts mettaton theme*: I think it's cute! In a sickeningly naive kinda way! 

Nickelback self insert: Pfft whatever Junko I know how much you secretly care about Mukuro and that bunch of elementary school kids that hang around you

_*Blasts mettaton theme* has gone offline_

Nickelback self insert: You can run from this group chat but you can't run from the fact that you have literally adopted five children 

\---  
**Gender was made up by the government to try and trick us into being capitalists**

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: Hey, what a great day to get harrassed!

*Keyboard smash* I'm in: Oh no what happened? 

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: Uhhhhbbbnnnn ok so

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: Basically I am currently on a date with Kaito, Shuichi and Maki

*Blasts mettaton theme*: Go ahead poly queen

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: And you guys know it's Tsumigi's birthday soon, so me and Maki stopped off at one of those anime merch stores while Shuichi and Kaito went to find a good place to eat

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: And, first off, me and Maki walk in holding hands but I guess this guy thought 'just gals being pals' because when I split off from Maki to look at something this guy just straight up starts hitting on me

Kill Bill sirens: He waited for you to be alone before hitting on you? 

*Keyboard smash* I'm in: That's... creepy...

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: Yeah, so I'm like trying as politely as I can to tell this obviously misogynistic geek to back off, I'm in a relationship, and Maki comes back and is just about to pull me away from the situation 

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: But then he must have seen the trans pride badge I have on my backpack because he points to it and says "what's that" and it's not like I'm going to be ashamed of it so I say "the trans pride flag" and he looks at me with this absolutely disgusted look on his face and says "oh god, you're not a tr*p, are you?" 

Kill Bill sirens: What the actual fuck 

*Blasts mettaton theme: Castrate him

Dating sim protagonist: What happened next? Are you ok? 

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: Well, I mean, Maki kind of flipped her shit

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: She punched the guy in the face and told him if he ever even looked at me again, she would murder him

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: The man at the till kicked all three of us out and I grabbed Maki and walked away before the guy could start anything else

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: But, yeah, Maki's currently on the phone to our boyfriends explaining what happened as well as finding out where to meet up

Kill Bill sirens: I am very proud of Maki for punching that guy

*Blasts mettaton theme*: Both because of her standing up for her girlfriend and for having to restraint to not strip him of his intestines 

Dating sim protagonist: Ughvujfd, can we be less graphic please? 

*Blasts mettaton theme*: For giving him a small ouchie instead of a big ouchie 

Dating sim protagonist: Never have I more wanted to end our friendship

*Blasts mettaton theme*: You love me really! 

*kerboard smash* I'm in: Actually Junko you're only his sixth most texted friend

*Blasts mettaton theme*: WHAT?!?!

Dating sim protagonist: Hey can we talk about this later and make sure Kaede's alright first? 

Kill Bill sirens: Seconded

*keyboard smash* I'm in: Right! Sorry Kaede! 

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: It's fine 

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: We've met up with Shuichi and Kaito now and Kaito is fuming 

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: Maki is trying to make him sit down because we're literally in a cafe right now and he's like borderline shouting about the guy

*keyboard smash* I'm in: At least you can rely on your partners to support you through these troubled times 

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: Yeah :)

The brave little toaster: Oh dear! That's horrible Kaede! What an ignorant slut! 

Dating sim protagonist: Oh my god where did he learn that phrase? 

The brave little toaster: From Miu, me and Angie are both in her dorm right now.

WELCOME TO BIBLE STUDY: ATUA WILL SMITE THAT WRETCHED SOUL DOWN!!! >:((((((

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: Oh shit

*keyboard smash* I'm in: The Kaede defense squad has rolled in 

*Blasts mettaton theme*: SMITE HIM SMITE HIM SMITE HIM SMITE HIM

Kill Bill sirens: Junko no

*Blasts mettaton theme*: JUNKO YES! SMITE HIM SMITE HIM SMITE HIM

Kill Bill sirens: ...

Kill Bill sirens: Smite him smite him smite him

The brave little toaster: Sibling loyalty! 

WELCOME TO BIBLE STUDY: He will face Atua's wrath, don't you worry :)

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: Ok guys, we've finally calmed Kaito down enough so I think I'm gonna go now

Dating sim protagonist: Enjoy you're date! 

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: Will do! Love you all <3 

_Wannabe Kelsi Neilson has gone offline_

*Blasts mettaton theme*: What a babe 

*keyboard smash* I'm in: I like her alot

*Blasts mettaton theme*: But now let's get back to how in the fuck am I only Makoto's sixth most texted friend? Who's the top five? 

*keyboard smash* I'm in: That is information I will only disclose if Makoto is ok with it

Dating sim protagonist: Yeah, I guess

Dating sim protagonist: But real quick, how do you actually know who my most texted friends are? 

*keyboard smash* I'm in: I have a lot of technological information about a lot of different people

*keyboard smash* I'm in: Don't worry about it

The brave little toaster: But that is very worrying news! 

*keyboard smash* I'm in: Eh it's fine

*keyboard smash* I'm in: So the top five most texted in Makoto's contacts are

*keyboard smash* I'm in: 1. Komaru Naegi

*keyboard smash* I'm in: 2. Sayaka Maizono

*keyboard smash* I'm in: 3. Byakuya Togami

*keyboard smash* I'm in: 4. Kyouko Kirigiri

*keyboard smash* I'm in: 5. Mukuro Ikusaba-Enoshima 

Kill Bill sirens: Wait I understand why Komaru is your most texted

*Blasts mettaton theme*: But why is Sayaka and Byakuya above your literal girlfriend? 

Dating sim protagonist: Oh well 

Dating sim protagonist: I don't really know 

WELCOME TO BIBLE STUDY: How are you and Kyouko doing? ^_^

Dating sim protagonist: Fine 

Dating sim protagonist: Idk 

Kill Bill sirens: You don't know?

Dating sim protagonist: It doesn't matter, we're doing good

Kill Bill sirens: Hmmm

Dating sim protagonist: Where are the rest of you guys on the romance end? 

Kill Bill sirens: Well I'm possibly the most uninteresting person ever in both looks and personality so it's looking pretty bleak tbh

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Jesus

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Calm down Nagito jfc

Kill Bill sirens: Nagito has a boyfriend so your point is invalid 

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: I believe my burn still stands 

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Let's ask the judge 

WELCOME TO BIBLE STUDY: It still stands :3 

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Score one for Junkooooo

The brave little toaster: I think you're very interesting, Mukuro

*keyboard smash* I'm in: Yeah I don't think an ex-mercenary can actually be boring? 

Kill Bill sirens: You'd be surprised

Dating sim protagonist: You're amazing Mukuro, chill

WELCOME TO BIBLE STUDY: Also, you have such cute freckles and the ability to swiftly kill people! On my island, those traits are very desirable! 

*keyboard smash* I'm in: That's gay

WELCOME TO BIBLE STUDY: It's true! I would definitely be up for some fun with you Mukuro! ;) 

Kill Bill sirens: afytfjrtsehrahre

Kill Bill sirens: I mean, thanks, but I'm already pretty deep in a crush for someone else

WELCOME TO BIBLE STUDY: That is ok! I have other options that I am currently working on ^-^ 

WELCOME TO BIBLE STUDY: In fact, that is why I am at Miu's dorm right now!

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Hey Mukuro

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Is it Sayaka? 

Kill Bill sirens: Wow look at that, I have training with Maki and Peko right about now

Kill Bill sirens: Bye 

_Kill Bill sirens has gone offline_

*keyboard smash* I'm in: Maki??? Is on a date??? With her partners rn???? 

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: And that kids is what we call denial

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Anyway, to answer your earlier question Makoto, me and Leon are now the legal parents of Monaca, Kotoko, Jataro, Masaru, and Nagisa

Dating sim protagonist: Are you actually because that wouldn't surprise me

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: _@Nickelback self insert_

The brave little toaster: I'm confused, are Junko and and Leon actually dating? Or just qpps? 

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Yes 

Nickelback self insert: Wazzup

*keyboard smash* I'm in: Wazzup? 

Nickelback self insert: Wazzuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup

*keyboard smash* I'm in: Wazzuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Leon, are we parents now? 

Nickelback self insert: Yes

Nickelback self insert: Well

Nickelback self insert: Not legally 

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Yeah but laws are just like recommended guidelines so they don't really count

*keyboard smash* I'm in: No???

The brave little toaster: That is not how that works 

Nickelback self insert: But yeah basically Masaru accidentally called Junko mum yesterday so now Junko and I are coming in on parents' day for Masaru, Jataro and Kotoko

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Because their asshole bio parents dont ever show up 

Rough boi: Imma be honest Junko, I don't think you'll make a good impression

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: You come online only to wound me

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Avenge me Leon

Nickelback self insert: At least they can reach the top shelf unlike some shorties I know

Rough boi: Say goodbye to your kneecaps asshole

Nickelback self insert: Fuck

_Nickelback self insert has gone offline_

\---

** Gender was made up by the government to try and trick us into being capitalists **

8-bit beauty: You guys wanna see a wholesome meme about our favourite poly relationship? 

The Blue's Clues guy: ???

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Would I!

8-bit beauty: Would you? 

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Would I! 

8-bit beauty: Would you? 

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Would I! 

8-bit beauty: Would you?

Rough boi: I fucking hate all of you

8-bit beauty: :( 

Rough boi: I hate all of you except Chiaki and Chihiro who I would murder for, no question

*keyboard smash* I'm in: ^~^

8-bit beauty: <3 

8-bit beauty: So here's the meme

8-bit beauty: Shit tier- Shuichi sometimes uses pet names but mostly just uses first names for his partners

Okay tier- Maki calls Kaito idiot but apart from that uses first names

Good tier- Kaito uses specific pet names for all his partners

God tier- Kaede literally only calls all of her partners honey so nobody actually knows who the fuck she's ever talking to

8-bit beauty: This meme was curtesy of Ryoma 

Rough boi: ngl Ryoma's great 

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: omfggggggg

The Blue's Clues guy: I'm crying why is this so accurate 

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: I came out to have a good time and I'm honestly feeling so attacked right now

Too many kinks to kinkshame: I'm afraid to say that most people do get attacked when they come out 

Rough boi: Way to lighten the mood Kiyo 

The Blue's clues guy: It does get confusing sometimes Kaede 

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: Too bad hon I'm not changing it 

Literally Dory: fsicdg fuck 

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: H-hewwo? 

8-bit beauty: A wild furry has been spotted 

Wannabe Kelsi Neilson: You ok Aoi? 

Literally Dory: No! 

Literally Dory: My brother just told me he's gay! 

The Blue's clues guy: ...

Too many kinks to kinkshame: Uhhh

*keyboard smash* I'm in: Aoi you're literally a lesbian? 

Literally Dory: I know

Lowkey should probably be in prison: So what's the problem? 

Literally Dory: The problem is that if he knows he's gay he is attracted to guys ie he has crushes on guys ie my baby brother might get a boyfriend which I cannot allow! 

Lowkey should probably be in prison: Why exactly? 

Literally Dory: Because he's my baby brother! And boys are at least 50% worse in relationships than girls! 

The Blue's Clues guy: Can't argue 

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Calm down Tenko 

Too many kinks to kinkshame: May I also point out that your brother is very attractive and athletically commendable, therefore making him a desirable partner to many homosexual males 

*keyboard smash* I'm in: Christ

Rough boi: Why are you so fucking creepy? 

Literally Dory: 1. If you say anything like that about Yuta again I will get Sakura to kick you into Mars 2. He does make a point

Lowkey should probably be in prison: Aoi, how old is your brother? 

Literally Dory: 15 

Lowkey should probably be in prison: So don't you think he's old enough to be thinking about relationships? Didn't you when you were that age? 

*keyboard smash* I'm in: You did start dating Sakura when you were 15

Literally Dory: Yeah but I was still a full academic year older than he is now! 

Literally Dory: But you're probably right...

Lowkey should probably be in prison: Glad I could help

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: Btw Makoto totally knows who your brother likes

Literally Dory: What?! 

Lowkey should probably be in prison: ffs Junko

*Blasts Mettaton theme: <3 

Literally Dory: _@Dating sim protagonist_

Dating sim protagonist: Hi? 

Literally Dory: Who does my brother like?! 

Dating sim protagonist: Oh

Dating sim protagonist: How do you know I know? 

*Blasts Mettaton theme*: I correctly deduced with my awesome skills as the Ultimate Analyst™ that your sister would've told you who Yuta is crushing on

Literally Dory: It better not be you Makoto! 

Dating sim protagonist: What? No! 

Dating sim protagonist: Can you imagine how weird that would be? That would be like one of our friends dating Komaru! 

Literally Dory: Yeah,,,, haha,,,, weird 

Dating sim protagonist: ? 

Dating sim protagonist: Anyway I don't know if I should tell you or not because I kind of just overheard it while Komaru and Kanon were talking about so it's not really my place to say

Literally Dory: TELL! ME! 

Dating sim protagonist: ... 

Literally Dory: Makoto pleeeaaaassseeeeee 

Dating sim protagonist: mmmmmm

Literally Dory: I won't mention anything to him! I just want to know

Dating sim protagonist: Fine

Dating sim protagonist: It's Takemichi Yukimaru

Literally Dory: THE ONE WHO IS PART OF THE FUCKING CRAZY DIAMONDS?!?!?! 

Dating sim protagonist: Ummm... Yeah

_Literally Dory has gone offline_

Dating sim protagonist: Aoi??? 

\---

Yuta is just sitting on the couch playing a video game when he hears Aoi shout his name. And he's scared because he can hear stomping footsteps coming down the stairs. He doesn't know what he did to induce her wrath but he is now standing and using one of the couch cushions as a shield against any projectiles his sister might throw at him.

"Stop being gay!" Aoi yells at him as she rounds to corner, pointing an accusatory finger at him.

Yuta just stares, dumbfounded at her. "No," He says and throws the cushion at her. 

"I know you're into Takemichi, so stop being gay for a juvenile delinquent!" She continues, lobbing the cushion back at him. It hits him in his now-red face and he curses.

"Ow, what the fuck Aoi?!" 

"See! You're swearing now!" 

Before he can get away Aoi tackles her brother to the couch. He tries to wrestle her off but unfortunately she is much stronger and more persistent.

"I don't have a crush on Michi!" He lies, blushing. 

"Do too, you just used a nickname for him," She grins. 

"I only came out two days ago and you're already accusing me of liking any of my guy friends," Yuta complains and tries again in vain to struggle against his sister's iron grip.

"If you don't admit it to me I'm gonna tell mum you swore," She narrows her eyes at him, a smirk appearing on her stupid face. 

"You wouldn't," He glares back. 

"MUUUUUUUUUUUM!" She shrieks and Yuta immediately panics.

"Fine, fine, I'll tell you, Jesus!" Aoi stops and like always their parent ignores the first scream of her name. "You're such a bully," 

"I can't believe my baby brother's become so disrespectful of his big sis," She fakes a teary voice and pulls Yuta up on the couch to face her. 

Yuta flushes and and looks away from Aoi as he speaks. "I like Michi, I don't think he likes me back, and I'm scared to do anything because he's like my best friend," 

"Oof," Aoi cringes and he gives her a wilting look. "Isn't Takemichi gay though?" 

"Yeah but that doesn't mean-!" Yuta groans and puts his head in his hands. "You act like you're not gay too," 

Aoi contemplates him. She didn't at all approve of her brother hanging out with a guy like Takemichi as friends in the first place, but he turned out to be surprisingly cool headed and smart. She guesses it's because he has to balance out Mondo a lot. And she always hated seeing her brother upset, so...

"Well I am the older and wiser gay, so I guess it's my duty to help you have a successful first crush!" She surmises. 

"He isn't my first crush," Yuta shrugs. 

"Let's pretend he is so that I don't have to think about who you're sexual awakening was," She sticks her tongue out in disgust. 

"I hate you," Yuta puts his head in his hands again.

"Love you too bro~" 

\---

_Swimmer_Aoi to  Gang_Leader_Mondo_

Swimmer_Aoi: My little brother wants to do the do with you're little brother

Gang_Leader_Mondo: What?

Gang_Leader_Mondo: I don't have a little brother?

Gang_Leader_Mondo: Aoi? 

Gang_Leader_Mondo: Do you mean Take? 

Gang_Leader_Mondo: Goddamit Aoi you useless lesbian

**Author's Note:**

> Eyyyyyy, it's ya boy... Ill and suffering! And nothing cheers me up more than self indulgent chatfics.


End file.
